Our House Rules

Another Friday re-run. This was originally posted on July 16, 2009 and we STILL have this list displayed on our fridge!

I've watched enough Super Nanny to know that it benefits everyone in the house to put some "Family Rules" in writing. Well, after writing out our Family Mission Statement, I decided to go over it with the kids, so they know our goals as a household. Then I quickly realized it is too complicated for them to understand at this age. So I updated and simplified our House Rules and typed them up to display on the fridge. They align perfectly with our mission statement and are all things we are either currently struggling with or have struggled with in the past. Having this list in print also gives me a reference to go back to when I need to remind the kids of a certain behavior, and it keeps my mini-lecture short and consistent every time, instead of using different words or examples and potentially confusing or overwhelming them.

I thought I'd post these just in case it inspires some of you to sit down and create your own house rules. They will likely mold and change over time, but putting something down on paper gives them much more power than just having them in your head. Saying, "No arguing, Ryan. Remember: it's a house rule," impacts him much more quickly for some reason. It's almost like, he understands the concept of rules being non-negotiable...they are what they are.

* Listen and obey the first time – say “Yes Mom” or “Yes Dad”
* Be respectful – no talking back or arguing with grown ups or guests
* Use your words – no whining, pouting or bad attitudes
* Be honest – no lying, ever
* Love each other – no hitting, biting, pinching or scratching
* Be kind and joyful - treat others how you want to be treated and be respectful of others and their belongings
* Be grateful – you get what you get and don’t throw a fit; no arguing or complaining
* Use manners – no interrupting when others are talking, inside voices in the house, say, "please," "thank you," and "excuse me."
* Be generous and considerate – share and take turns, let others go first, don’t be selfish with toys or games
* Do what is right – even when others don’t or when no one is looking
* Work out differences using soft words – no screaming, whining or tattling
* Look for ways to serve others with a happy heart

Q&A Wednesday - Being Flexible with Dinner

Julie asked, "Do you ever spontaneously go out to dinner, during the week? Even though you have meal planned and even half-prepped and then lost your taste and motivation?"

Ironically, just moments before receiving this question, I thought, "I'm kind of in the mood to go out tonight. I wonder if Mike would be up for that?" Then I changed my mind because the lasagna was all made and just needed to be popped into the oven.

I've found that our dining budget has been significantly lower since I began meal planning way back when. Before that, I called Mike at least once a week to see if we could eat out. Not when a meal was half-prepped, but usually because I couldn't figure out what to make and wasn't in the mood to be creative. Usually if I have a plan and have started making the meal and the end is in sight, I don't want to "waste" a valuable night out.

I will say this: every so often when Mike is in the mood to eat out and I have a dinner plan in mind, I will actually request that we stay home to eat. Partly because it screws up my master plan, but also because (again) I want to save our dining budget for a night that I'm too exhausted to cook.

Our monthly dining-out allowance is pretty lean, so when we do go out to eat, it's always with a coupon or on a "Kids Eat Free" night. We throw caution to the wind and spend full price on a dinner maybe 3-4 times a year. And that includes our anniversary and my birthday! I know - we're cheap.

Keep the questions coming! Leave a comment if you have something on your mind that I can answer next Wednesday.

Get everyone talking

I've read some great conversation-starter ideas lately that I want to share. We usually talk about these things at dinner, but you can do them anytime your family is together. Couples without kids can do these too!

The first idea is from the book I'm reading, "7 Habits of Highly Effective Families." There was a suggestion to go around the table every night saying something positive about one family member. Last Friday, things were tense for some reason and I decided to start the tradition with Ryan, who I hoped would change his attitude before his football game that night. Mike, Kaylin and I each said something positive about him and he was absolutely beaming. His whole countanence changed, as did the mood of the table. Saturday it was Mike's turn and today was Kaylin. (she even said something nice about herself) We'll just keep going down the list!

Then this morning, I saw this idea on Sarah Mae's blog. Every day, she asks her daughter the same four questions:
What made you happy today?
What made you feel sad today?
What made you feel angry today?
What brought you joy today?

We went around the dinner table asking these questions tonight and it sparked some awesome conversations and insight into our kids' days. Kaylin's "What made you feel angry today?" answer was when Mike left for work and Ryan left for school before she woke up so she didn't get to kiss them good-bye. It didn't make her sad, it actually made her angry. I found that interesting. And next time she sleeps in, I'll make sure everyone wakes her up to give her a hug and a kiss.

The last idea is one I heard years ago. It's along the same lines, but a little more simplified. It's called, "Gratefuls and Grumbles." Everyone in the family shares something that they're grateful for and something that made the "grumble" during the day.

Does anyone else have an idea of a good conversation starter that works for your family?

#42...again

#42 - Add ads to my blog to help bring in a little income. You probably noticed the huge ad that appeared on my sidebar this month. It's my newest attempt to tackle #43 on my list of 101 in 1001. The "income" from the other ads on my blog has been virtually non-existent, so after deleting most of the original ads last year, I'm trying "BlogHer" ads. We'll see if it's worth it! If you see something you like advertised, click on it. I think I get a gazillion dollars per click...or maybe only a few cents. I'm not real sure...didn't read the fine print...

Meal Plan - 4/26/10

Monday - Beef Stir Fry
Tuesday - Turkey Noodle Soup
Wednesday - Artichoke Chicken with rice and salad (didn't make it last week)
Thursday - Turkey Pot Pie
Friday - Penne with Meatballs (using the Turkey Meatloaf with Feta and Sun-Dried Tomatoes recipe)
Saturday - Southwestern Chicken and Bean Pasta
Sunday - Lasagna Roll Ups

Our Family Mission Statement

I've gotten out of the habit of posting re-runs on Fridays. Not sure how that happened, but this is a good one to re-post. This was originally published in July, 2009. Enjoy!

Recently, Simple Mom wrote a great post with 20 starter questions to get people thinking about what to include in a family mission statement. After two years and a dozen attempts to sit down and come up with a mission statement on our own, this was just the tool we needed to finally complete #51 on my list of 101 goals in 1001 days.

The main point from the blog post (which was a little deep, but I soaked up every word) was to create a statement that "guides you as you make future decisions." To summarize a couple of her examples: if you're convinced as a family that your home should be a place where you practice hospitality to others, it makes more sense to keep it "ready" for guests and you're more motivated to keep it straightened. If a goal is to live simply and free from the burden of others, it's logical to strive to be debt-free and not accumulate needless clutter.

Yesterday, Mike and I each filled out the 20 questions separately, then met after the kids were in bed to compare our answers and see where we have common themes. The repeated themes we saw (which weren't a huge surprise) were Honesty/Integrity, Love/Respect, Financial Responsibility and to be Christ-like. So, based on the skeleton that Simple Mom suggested as a first draft, this is what we came up with. We're going to further expand on the points within the mission statement this weekend, but for now, this is the meat of it:

We believe that our purpose as a family is to be Christ-like, to live with integrity, to live simply, to maintain a sense of family unity, to be good stewards of our resources and to lead by example.

We will accomplish this by:
* valuing truth and love as our main guiding principals
* making our home a place of peace, joy, kindness and hospitality
* prioritizing integrity above lesser values and
* interacting with each other in a spirit of respect.

I have to say that this completely reflects the priorities that Mike and I have felt, but have been unable to properly verbalize. I've framed this mission and have it displayed on our bookshelf, knowing that we may need to revise or tweek it over time. But for now, it's perfect.

Halfy Birthday, Jason!

Where have the last six months gone? Jason is getting too big, too fast. I wish I could stop time for a few months to soak up his adorableness. I love, love, LOVE this age. Love it. Love. It.

In the last few weeks, Jason has:

...fallen asleep in some weird places


...started holding his own bottle


...found his feet


...started reaching for toys (and cords...and faces...) with both hands


...started rolling side to side (but still hasn't flipped to his tummy yet)


...started eating rice cereal every day (and bananas last week)


...sleeping in his big brother's room full time now, as of last weekend


...finally started to laugh. (though it's few and far between...when you tickle him, he holds his breath and his face turns red until you stop)


And his hair is getting longer and longer every day. Some days it looks red, others pale blonde. Any votes for what color you think it will be?

The kids and I had a little mini-party for him after school today. He thought no one would notice if he reached to have a little taste, but I'm quicker than he is - I took the picture AND took the cupcake away in a single bound.

Happy 6 months, sweet boy!

(Here's a video of us singing/having a meltdown.)

Q&A Wednesday - All About Me, Part 2

Dawn asked the following:

What exercises do you do on your Wii Fit?
I mostly play games on the Wii Fit (snowball fights, Kung Fu, obstacle course) but I actually get a work out doing the Wii Active. I have the newer version, which has a 6 week challenge. (I've heard that the older version had a 30 day challenge) Every day, the workouts are customized, getting progressively harder as you build up endurance. I started on the medium level at Christmas, even though I hadn't truly worked out in months. It kicked me into shape real quick!!! LOVE it. I just moved on to the second 6 weeks at an advance level.

What's the best gift you've received from your husband?
By far, my cruise for our 10 year anniversary. Hands down!

Did you do any sports in school?
Nope - nada! Not in high school, anyway. I was on the swim team and did dance until we moved to a different area of town when I was 11, then I cheered in middle school.

In high school, I tried out for cheerleading, but all of the tumblers made the squad. I couldn't do a back handspring to save my soul, so my cheer days ended in 8th grade.

Next, I attempted volleyball. The day before try outs began, I got a booster shot that kept me from raising my left arm above my shoulder. It's hard to set when you can't lift your arm! Didn't make that team, either. That's where I stopped. I got really involved with my church youth group and Young Life and left it at that.

What's your favorite chore and least favorite chore?
I do not love chores, but if I had to pick my favorite, it would be cooking and baking - creating anything in the kitchen. I also don't mind laundry, as long as it doesn't pile up.

My least favorite chore is cleaning the bathrooms. I consistently procrastinate this, but once it's done, I feel so silly for putting it off. I'm trying to come up with a cleaning schedule that I can stick with so my bathrooms don't feel so dirty and the task isn't so overwhelming when I finally get around to doing it!

Keep the questions coming! Leave a comment if you have something on your mind that I can answer on a future Q&A Wednesday.

Creating a "Pause Button"

This morning I blew it. My first interaction with Ryan was a horrible example of my recent preachings teachings to the kids about the importance of having self control.

I moved Jason into the crib in Ryan's room this weekend. It's been working out well so far, even though he still wakes up crying around the 5:30 hour. Ryan has gotten up every day to give him his pacifier before the fussing turns into screaming and Jason even fell back to sleep for over an hour today with his pacifier back in. I was thrilled!

Until I heard Ryan go to the bathroom. I peeked on the video monitor to see if Jason stirred. Nope - out cold. Ryan snuck back into his room and closed the door quietly. Jason still didn't budge. "Wow," I thought, "Maybe I should have made this transition sooner?"

Then Ryan flipped his light on and poor Jason jolted awake. I immediately ran up the stairs and did the loud, harsh whisper. "Ry-YYYYYYEN! What are you DOING? That light just woke up the BABY!" (with the ever encouraging, "What are you, an idiot?!?!" tone...please don't all rush out to nominate me for Mother of the Year at the same time...)

I went back downstairs, fuming that Ryan doesn't ever seem to think before he acts. GRRRRR! That kid!

But wait...I didn't stop to think before I acted, so why would HE at just five years old? Ouch. (Can you hear my eyes rolling?)

So I had this light bulb moment. I took some time to pray that I could display the kind of self control, patience and consideration that I expect from my kids. I read my Bible for a bit, then opened up "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families" to read a little before everyone was awake and downstairs eating breakfast. Do you know what was on the first line of page 29?? (hey, that rhymed) The first thing I saw when I opened the book to my book mark? Here is the whole section:

Creating a "Pause Button"

It is so easy to be reactive! Don't you find this to be the case in your own life? You get caught up in the moment. You say things you don't mean. You do things you later regret. And you think, "Oh, if I had stopped to think about it, I never would have reacted that way!"

Obviously, family life would be a whole lot better if people
acted based on their deepest values instead of reacting to the emotion or circumstance of the moment. What we all need is a "pause button" - something that enables us to stop between what happens to us and our response to it, and to choose our own response.

It's possible for us as individuals to develop this capacity to pause. And it's also possible to develop a habit right at the center of a family culture of learning to pause and give wiser responses.

I really needed to hear that this morning. I thought maybe some of you might need to hear it too! Remember to pause before reacting today.

#83 - Invite five “new” neighbors over for lunch

When I added #83 to my list, I envisioned inviting five neighbor girls (that I don't know well) over for lunch to get to know each other better. I still intend to do that, but tonight totally accomplished the idea behind why I added this item to my list...10 fold.

Last week, I got a wild hair and made up 50 flyers to pass out to all of the houses on my block. I offered to host a block party BBQ and provide 100% of the food, all in an attempt to meet some of the new families who have moved in to the previously vacant homes in our neighborhood.

I borrowed a bounce house from a friend and put it in one neighbor's yard, had a couple other neighbors bring grills, tables and chairs and we blocked off the street so we didn't have to worry about the kids running all over the place. It was great - I highly recommend doing the same in your neighborhood!

60 people RSVPed and several others arrived unannounced. I hassled two neighbors doing yardwork and one of the couples ended up joining us. I even grabbed a gal on a walk with her daughter and convinced her to join the party. Turns out she has five kids at home and her husband is on a one-year tour in Iraq. She just moved in a month ago and only knows one neighbor!

I also met a gal who had a baby boy the same day I had Jason. I don't remember seeing another pregnant mom during that time - and I was even walking the neighborhood nightly to encourage labor.

Mike was leary that all 50 households would show up (feeding 150-200 people ain't cheap!) but it was a nice sized group. Personally, I was concerned that I invited random people I'd never met, wondering if I should have done a search for registered sex offenders in our neighborhood. Sometimes I don't think before I act!

As it turns out, almost everyone offered to bring something, so we only ended up buying hamburgers, hot dogs, buns and paper products. All of the drinks, chips, fruit and desserts were brought by other families. Plus, so many people showed up that we decided to do it out in the front yard, meaning I didn't have to worry about cleaning my house before or afterward. Bonus!

#83 on my list of 101 Goals is now crossed off, even though we did dinner instead of lunch and I invited 50 households instead of 5 women. :)

Meal Plan - 4/19/10

Monday - Sloppy Joes with Parmesan Garlic Fries
Tuesday - Quesadilla Pie
Wednesday - Rice, Bean and Cheese Casserole
Thursday - Artichoke Chicken with corn on the cob and salad
Friday - Chicken Taco Stew
Saturday - Chili (with ground turkey) and cornbread
Sunday - Turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, maybe even PIE!

Dessert:
Chocolate Krispie Treats

#69 - Sign Kaylin up for a dance class

I am so glad I finally found a cheap reasonably priced dance class to have Kaylin try. It's just at our local community center; a ballet/tap combo class. I think I'll sign her up for tumbling next and see what she likes best before getting her started at a real studio.

Look how dainty she looks in her little leotard and skirt with her hair all up in a bun! As we were walking into the building, she said she wants to go to dance class every day and she wasn't even in the classroom yet!


#69 on my 101 Goals in 1001 Days list is done!

#77 - Clean out my bedroom closet

I'm not sure how or why, but I ended up completely cleaning out my bedroom closet today. I planned to do it in small chunks over the next few days, then got on a roll and just kept going.

Admittedly, my closet is huge. I love it, but it ends up being a bit of a dumping ground. I haven't gone through each clothing item piece-by-piece yet, but I did weed out quite a bit before my garage sale a few months ago. If When I lose the last 10 pounds to get down to my preferred weight, I'll go through each clothing item and be ruthless about donating, but for now, I need options.

You will notice the spare bathroom tiles (below) that were placed in my closet when we moved into our house...FOUR YEARS AGO. Those are finally gone. The pantyhose that I've saved from my working days "just in case" are gone. The pile of clothes to go to the dry cleaner that has been accumulating for two, three, maybe even four years...gone, gone, gone.

(the right side of the closet - before)

(the right side of the closet - after)


(the left side of the closet - before)

(the left side of the closet - after)

Okay, so don't judge me for labeling my shelves (above). After I had Kaylin, I was so overwhelmed with piles of clothes, never remembering what fit, that I labeled areas of the shelves so I could get dressed in a reasonable amount of time each day.

I made use of the random shelf on top of the bottom rack of clothes...

#77 was one of the things I've been dreading on my 101 Goals in 1001 Days list. And now it's done - WOO HOO!!!

Q&A Wednesday - Working Through Unemployment

Anonymous asked, "Please share your tips and tricks for making it through the bout of unemployment. Did you do anything special to help Mike not feel depressed about it?"

For my newer readers, Mike was laid off from a great job at our church in the Fall of 2008. It was toward the beginning of our economy's downturn, but I was somehow completely caught off guard by the change, as was Mike. You can read about the details to get yourself caught up here.

We went through a myriad of emotions while he was unemployed. As I said in this post, "Mike is obviously concerned about providing for our family, taking care of our financial needs, things like that. While I'm hopeful that he'll find a job soon and that we won't exhaust our savings, that's not what has me rattled. I've suddenly become a little over-protective of our 'family life' and keeping things healthy and on the right track with our marriage and parenting." That was my concern at the time: our family.

Walking alongside Mike during his last two weeks of employment was tough. He was unbelievably stressed and anxious about our future. Being strong for the kids' sake and supporting him was almost too much for me to handle at certain points in time. I mentioned in this post that I knew God had something great in store for us at some point in the future, but I quickly lost confidence that I was emotionally capable of waiting for that time to come.

I'll be honest: that experience was extremely difficult. It was hard to be around Mike because he was so beaten down. After a period of self-preservation, we finally took some time to talk and agreed to work through everything arm-in-arm.

Once the shock subsided for me, I had to make the decision to be Mike's rock. He would undoubtedly send dozens of resumes before receiving a single reply. I anticipated his confidence and his self worth deteriorating over time. I had no control over his attitude or his mood, but I had complete control of how I responded to him. I could be angry, hurt, defensive, offended, shoot back nasty looks or retaliate with harsh words OR I could choose to ask how I could help, how I could support him, if I could pray with him.

Men feel such a burden when they are the sole financial provider for the home. I believe that they're wired that way - even if the wife also works. I was recently contacted by one of my best guy friends from high school. He has been unable to find work for over a year and sounded so down. He loves seeing his kids more now that he's forced to be the "stay at home dad," but it sounded like being supported by his wife's career was completely emasculating. My heart breaks for his situation.

Mike was unemployed during the holidays, which should have been a great period to have Daddy home every day. But it wasn't. He was tense, the kids didn't understand why he was home but couldn't/wouldn't play with them (he'd spend 6-8 hours on the computer looking for jobs each day) - it was very confusing for everyone to adjust to the new dynamic.

We had several conversations during those months about "what if" scenarios. Mike is so analytical that these discussions helped him understand that no matter what happened, no matter how bad it got, I would be there for him and would stick by him. For example, we often talked about the possibility of losing our house. I loved our house. I still do. But it's a house. I expressed to him over and over that if it got to the point where we had to move, I would turn our next house (or apartment or where ever) into a home that we would love just as much. The house is just a building and as much as we've always thought of this place as our dream home, it's just. a. house.

If you're going through financial struggles right now, realize the pressure that your spouse is feeling and decide to be their rock. Do whatever you need to do to reduce spending to make them feel more secure with your budget. Reassure your spouse that you're not going anywhere, no matter what the future holds. Pray. Individually and with your spouse. Pray for guidance, wisdom and strength. Pray for protection for your children. Pray that God brings you together through this experience; as a family and as a couple.

Does anyone else have thoughts about this subject?

What I'm Focusing on This Week

I started feeling a little overwhelmed this weekend, so I decided it might help me to get a few things out of my head. Sure enough, seeing everything listed out, I do have a ridiculous number of things I'm trying to accomplish this week. No wonder I'm dizzy!

For the kids, I've been working with them both on staying in their rooms after we tuck them in at night. Kaylin has been very motivated by the reward system, but Ryan is taking a little longer to comply. There's always a little bit of wiggle room in his mind. Regardless, our evenings have been nice and quiet the last few nights. No faint whispers of "Mommy?" from the stairs, no running water coming from the bathroom, nothing. Just sweet silence.

I've also been rewarding them for staying in their rooms until 6:45am and not coming downstairs until all of their "chores" are done. (get dressed, put PJs away, brush teeth, make bed) I'm desperately trying to nip the morning dawdling in the bud. I'm OVER the tension at the breakfast table to get Ryan out the door to the bus. Keeping everyone in their rooms until they're dressed eliminates chatting and playing which eliminates rushing and me barking orders. Every day has gotten a little bit better and I see the light at the end of the tunnel on this one!

As for me, I've started waking up at 6am every day to cross #1 off my 101 Goals list. It was #1 because it was the first thing that popped into my head; something I've wanted to do for a long, long time. With the sun rising a little earlier these days, waking up early hasn't been as tough as usual. It's so much nicer to get a few things done in the morning instead of having my kids wake me up by bursting into my bedroom.

Another thing making this 6am goal a little easier lately is my 5:30am "crying baby alarm" - something else I'm working on. I have NO IDEA why Jason wakes up at 5:30 every day. I've tried everything: putting him to bed later, shortening his daytime naps to try making him more tired at night, feeding him a formula bottle before bed, starting him on rice cereal to keep him full longer...nothing is working! I realize I'm probably a few weeks away from him figuring out how to put his pacifier back in his own mouth, which will help, but for now, it's really messing me up. Because when he gets up at 5:30, he's ready for a nap by 7:30am, which moves my whole day up by at least an hour, then he's exhausted and ready to go down for the night by 5:30pm. That early of a bedtime does NOT work for me!

I think part of the issue has been that Jason's been going through a growth spurt. The other day, I nursed him at 10am (what should have been a full feeding) but he still acted starving. I gave him another SIX ounces of formula before he finally stopped fussing and acted satisfied. What's funny is that I can totally see that he's chunked up a bit. Just a week ago, I looked at him and thought, "This is my first baby that hasn't been huge. He's in the right size clothes for his age, he doesn't have tons of rolls like the other kids, he's even got skinny little legs." Then POOF. Growth spurt and now he's a little rollie pollie.

On that note, something else I need to do soon is to pull out my storage bin of 6-9 month boy clothes and rotate them into Jason's dresser. Just in time for his 6 month birthday! (Ryan was in 6-9 month clothes at 4 months.)

I spent a couple of hours yesterday getting all of the kids clothes organized. It felt SO good to bring order to the hand-me-downs, clearance items and garage sale purchases I've found over the last month.

That got me in the mood to declutter, which is just in time for Simple Mom's Spring Cleaning Week. I have some specific areas of the house that I'm itching to sort through. I'll try to remember to take before and after pictures to share my embarrassing nooks and crannies progress.

Those are all of the physical things I've been working on, but I have some habits with the kids I'm intentionally trying to break this week, too. I received an email newletter from Biblical Parenting titled, "What to do when kids are annoying." Judge me all you want, but I will be the first to admit that I've had those thoughts before. "Why is he making that annoying sound?!?!?" "I wish the kids would calm down - their getting annoying." I hate that I've actually used that label in my head, but the title certainly grabbed my attention. The article suggested working with your children on self-control and sensitivity. I printed the list and put it on the fridge this weekend and have referenced it several times already. (specifically the 4th point about limiting noises...my kids are not quiet creatures)

- Self-control is the ability to control myself so that Mom and Dad don't have to.
- Self-control means to think before I act.
- Self-control is the ability to talk about problems instead of grabbing, pushing, or hitting.
- Self-control means that I limit the noises I make when others are around.
- Self-control means that I focus on one thing until it gets done, before I move to the next.
- Sensitivity means that when I walk into a room I look and listen before I speak.
- Sensitivity is thinking about how my actions are affecting other people.
- Sensitivity means thinking about how I could help someone else.

The other bad habit that needs to be broken in our house is not reacting emotionally. Luckily, that's a self-control issue, so it kind of ties into the article I just mentioned. If I hear, "HEEEEEEEY-YUH!" one more time, I might lose my mind. My newest mantra is, "Please change your tone." I say it again and again. And again. And again. I hate how disrespectful the tones have become around here! I blamethat one on school and look forward to removing that element this summer.

Last night, I handed Ryan some glass cleaner and a towel to clean his handprints off the sliding glass door. I wasn't necessarily trying to punish him, just teach him a little responsibility and to clean up after himself. I actually had to take it away from him 30 minutes later...he LOVED cleaning the glass! So I taught him how to do it correctly and have decided that will be one of his new jobs. He's thrilled.

Then when I was folding laundry yesterday, I gave Kaylin some dishtowels and wash clothes to fold with me. Not only did it make her feel helpful, she actually did a pretty good job! She was ridiculously proud. So that will be another new chore that she can help with, too. I forget as they get older, they are more able to help. And at this age, more willing to help!

Are you exhausted just reading about all of this? Yeah, me too. The most intense item on the list is working with the kids on self-control and reminding them to speak respectfully all. day. long. Setting my alarm clock, bribing them before bed, organizing...those don't take as much mental energy as it does to constantly be intentional and keep their attitudes in check.

After all that explaining, I think I need a nap. I could blame that one on my 5:30 baby alarm, too.

Out of the Mouths of {my} Babes

This morning, Kaylin shouted over the closing garage door as Mike and Ryan left for the bus stop...

Kaylin: "Have a good day, Daddy! Be a good example to your friends, Ryan! Remember to stand up for yourself if {best friend's name} says, 'I won't be your friend unless you do something for me.' See you after work, Daddy! See you after school, Ryan!"

Her words became faster and more desperate as the garage door lowered and she lost sight of Mike's car. She's such a mini-mama!

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While stripping the sheets off my bed...

Kaylin: "Mom? Did you pee in your bed last night?"
Me: "Um, nooooo..."
Kaylin: "Then why are you taking the sheets off?"

Apparently I need to explain that we need to wash sheets regularly, whether or not someone has had an accident.

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While at my mom's for a sleepover...

Ryan: "Grandma, my egg peed on my plate."
Grandma: "That's not pee, it's the yoke."
Kaylin: "Ew, I don't like yoga."

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Ryan's homework last week was to write a note to a friend in class and tell the person why he likes them. This was his note.

"Der Lily, I lik you because your cut and your nis." Oh boy, I'm in trouble already. Lily IS cute and she IS nice. If he's going to make a heart shaped card for a little girl in class, she is one of the few girls that are acceptable for this mama.

(Dear Lily, I like you because you're cute and you're nice.)

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Background: I'm cracking down on the kids coming out of their rooms 100 times after we put them to bed.

After our Bible study the other night, I come upstairs and here Kaylin's voice, clear as day, saying, "Mom?"

I looked around and didn't see her anywhere. Her door was closed, so I thought I was hearing things. About 30 seconds later, I hear it again: "Mom?"

I realized she was talking through the crack under her door. I opened the door and took one step in and noticed that the carpet I was standing on was very warm.

Me: "Kaylin? How long have you been laying on the floor by your door?"
(We put the kids to bed at 7:00 on Bible study nights and it was 9-something at this point.)
Kaylin: (smiling sheepishly) "I don't know. I didn't want to get in trouble, so I didn't open it. I'm hungry."
Me: "Were you peeking under the door this whole time, waiting for me to come up the stairs?"
Kaylin: "Yes, that way you could hear me say your name under the door."

At least I know she's taking me seriously when I tell her not to come out of her room unless there's an emergency!

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Ryan: "Daddy, I had a dream about you last night."
Mike: "Oh yeah? What was it about?"
Ryan: "Well, we were at the beach and I kept throwing you into the ocean. But you kept swimming back. So I kept throwing you back in. Then one time, you didn't come back out of the water. I think you gave up and died."
Mike: "Did you learn anything from the dream?"
Ryan: "Yeah - I need to listen and obey the first time. You told me not to keep throwing you in the water but I kept doing it. Then you finally gave up and stayed there."
Mike: "Did that make you sad?"
Ryan: "Yeah. I should have listened and obeyed."

Oh, the symbolism of dreams!!!

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This was Kaylin's prayer before breakfast yesterday. It lasted at least 2-3 minutes...it definitely gave the oatmeal plenty of time to cool off! I had to stifle my giggles at several points - it was so hilarious that I grabbed a pen afterward and wrote down as much of what she said as I could remember.

Kaylin: "Dear Jesus, thank you for making this breakfast and thank you for making the whole world. And thank you for Easter and all of the candy that I got to eat. And thank you for dying on the cross for our sins. And thank you for opening doors. (she says that all the time and I have no idea where or when she heard it) And thank you that Daddy and Ryan didn't have to go to work and school that early and thank you that Daddy and Ryan are eating with us. And help me to stop coughing and that Ryan doesn't get sick. And thank you that I'm wearing a dress." (pictured to the right - I told her she could wear anything she wanted because it wasn't a school day and she picked the fanciest dress in her closet with sparkly black shoes and a red and white heart headband)
Mike: "In Jesus' name..."
Kaylin: "But I'm not done."
Mike: "Honey, I need to hurry and eat so I can take Ryan to the bus stop on time."
Me: "If you have more things to pray about, you can pray to Jesus silently if you want."
Kaylin: "Okay...in Jesus name. Amen."

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Tuesday night around 9:00, I noticed that the upstairs bathroom light was on and Ryan's door was open. I called Ryan's name a few times and he didn't answer, so I went into his room to ask why he left his door open. (Mike and I were having a pretty heavy discussion downstairs and I was going to talk to him about keeping his door closed after lights-out.) He stumbled over his words a dozen times, "Um, I...um...(silence)...um, because I, um..." before I finally realized that he was dead asleep. I hadn't noticed that his head was at the foot of his bed when I went in.

The next morning, I went into the bathroom to throw away Jason's diaper and saw dried pee on the top lid of the closed toilet and pee all over the floor. He is SUCH a heavy sleeper! This is actually the first time he's gotten himself up to go to the bathroom before morning. We still walk him into the bathroom around 9-10...and he often stays asleep the whole time. I need to remember to leave the lid up so he doesn't pee all over the place again! (Wait...did he just train me to leave the toilet lid UP?!?!?)

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Kaylin: "Mom, when I get to heaven, I'm going to thank God for making my baby." (she calls Jason her baby)

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My sweet Jason was trying to put a toy in his mouth yesterday, but he doesn't yet have control over his arm movements, so he slammed the toy into his forehead. He looked shocked, but unharmed. It was a pretty hard toy, but I didn't think to replace it with something softer until he did it again and his bottom lip started to quiver. He looked at me helplessly, like, "What did you do THAT for???" I scooped him up before he started completely crying. Poor little buddy - he didn't know what hit him. Literally!